God knows what I need. You know what I need.

He does. He knows exactly what I need.

Lately, I've been struggling with this fact. I call it fact because I know it's true, but it's a hard head-heart connection to make. I've been feeling like I need something, but then I don't get it and I go, "Lord, I thought You knew what I needed. This is what I need...." Still, it doesn't happen. I'm just waiting until I have a heart change. I want so badly to have what God wants for me. I want to feel like I need what He knows I need, not what I think I need.

This week has been filled with papers and homework and stuff like that. It's kind of sucked, but at the same time, I'm learning things that I didn't know before.

I'm also learning to trust. And not to trust when it's easy, but when it's hard and I don't want to trust people. Something that Jim reminded me of in a prayer this week is that love trusts. When I heard that, I went, "Crap. I gotta trust the people here. If I am saying I love them, then I need to show them that by trusting them." So I'm learning to trust.

Another thing that I've been discovering is that what I had planned for this year is pretty different from what the Lord had planned for this year. He's changing up what I thought would happen. I have been disappointed, hurt, and broken. But I think that slowly, I'm letting go of the disappointment, of the hurt, and I'm being put back together again. But it still sucks sometimes and it's really difficult and it's pushing me out of my comfort zone so much.

So that doesn't cover so much the events of this week, but it's what I've been learning.

Please pray for me. Also, please pray for a couple of the Kaleo girls who were in a car accident last night. They are doing okay, but they're in pain.

Thanks, everyone.